One of the most powerfully destructive forces on this planet is a lie.
The crazy part is that when we are withholding the full truth or blatantly speaking something false, we aren’t saving ourselves from the consequences of some other action. And, we also aren’t protecting the other person(s) from having to deal with the subject of the lie.
We are killing both them and ourselves.
The firstfruit of a lie is work. Do we realize how work must be put in to maintain a lie?
The details of the lie must be remembered. The satellite pieces of the lie must be aligned. In many cases, we need to get others to corroborate our stories to give more depth. AND, here’s the worst part of it all, all of this needs to be supported from now on!
I was listening to a comedian talk about getting home late after partying all night. He walks in the door at 5 am, and his girlfriend is waiting for him. He starts the lie by talking about a news story that she must’ve just missed. He then talks about how his best buddy was injured and needed assistance going to the ER. Then, he continues by talking about the details of the injury, and all of that delayed his arrival.
The girlfriend being untrusting, simply asks him to call his best buddy to which she immediately takes the phone. Now, the buddy has to provide the SAME details that were already given (even tho he doesn’t know ANY of the story). So, the guy is coaching his friend on the phone while his girl is actively talking to him.
I don’t know about you, but that is WORK!!
The children of a lie are dis-trust, dis-unity, and dis-truction (destruction). The lady in the above story didn’t trust him because she immediately wanted his buddy to confirm his account. The problem with distrust is that once the groundwork of lies has been laid, there is little that can be done to start anew. Once a liar, always a liar.
Then disunity comes because lying doesn’t help relationships. Even in those moments when we think it better to lie than tell the truth, the lie creates separation. One of the greatest lies that we say to our spouses is the answer to this question. “How do I look in this dress?”
When she asked the question, she already knew the answer. She was testing you to see if you were going to honest. My wife tends to ask me about her hair WHILE she is looking at it. So, if I say, “It looks good,” she already knows that I’m not paying any attention and that I’m lying. Since I’ve learned that she’s testing me, I’ve learned to be brutally honest.
“How’s my hair?”
“Ummm… There’s a hair out of place, and there’s a spot in the back that you need to get.”
This honesty has helped us to grow because she can trust that I will give her the correct answer, whether good or not.
Finally, it brings destruction. Lying says that I don’t love you. We may veil that lie in their protection, but, quite honestly, that isn’t the message that’s relayed. Men believe that it’s okay to lie because she can’t handle the truth. I prefer the opposite approach. My philosophy has been, “Don’t ask a question that you’re afraid of the answer.”
The ownership of the answer isn’t on me; it’s on the person asking the question. When I was younger, my mom would ask, “Did you finish the dishes?” Of course, my answer was “Yes ma’am” even tho I hadn’t even started the dishes. But, she KNEW when she asked that I didn’t do the dishes. So, why are you surprised that I’m still in the kitchen when you get home? I just started them 10 minutes before you got there!! The destruction of my backside soon followed, not because I didn’t do the dishes but, because I lied.
As adults, the same thing happens to us when we lie. The destruction may not come as a spanking of our hind parts, but it comes as lose. Our loses can include failed relationships, missed opportunities and even lost employment!
The Bible refers to lying as an ‘abomination’ in Proverbs 12. Liars are named among unbelievers, murderers, and sorcerers as having their part in the lake of fire and brimstone!
Lying is a hurtful act that can always be avoided. So, let’s not do it; it’s just that simple.